Thursday, April 28, 2005

I want this week to be over

Filing, data entry and other mind numbing work.
I want this week to be over. I have been coming home late.
I have not been able to go out. Too sleepy to do my bills.

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Me? Lawyer?

I am not sure if I want to be a lawyer. I got out the office an hour ago and some of the lawyers are still in the office.

Here are some comments that I found annoying and funny.

No one could possibly like being a lawyer unless they are an anal retentive f**knut.

I should be offended because my dad is a lawyer but I am going to have to give this one a pass. Whenever I got a bad grade on my report card, my father would demand all my homework, tests and notes from the class and would try to figure out what I did wrong.

Do not become a lawyer. Most lawyers are extremely unhappy. They become lawyers because they don't know what to do in life and then they spend the rest of their lives being miserable. Quit the paralegal job right now. Since you don't need the money, get an internship or low paying job in some field where you might have some possible interest - music, arts, magazine, whatever. Take this time to try different things. But obviously you are wasting your time working at a law firm.

I love being a lawyer. I had a great job in private practice, where I worked for over six years, and now I have a great job in-house. A person can be very happy being a lawyer. However, PP, I don't think it's right for you, and I don't think you're right for it.

You both remind me of this professor that ragged on my sister when she was taking organic chem. My sister did really crappy on the first exam, her TA told her to just give up and go marry a doctor instead of trying to be one. I think that TA helped her because my sister got so pissed that she studied her ass off and got an A in the class.

I mean I am still trying to figure this out. I have heard that this is true with alot of lawyers. I have hung out with lawyers at parties who bitch and moan about their jobs. I just started with this internship. I can't really make a decision yet. I am not sure if I want to do the music arts thing casue VD does alot of that I learn alot when she talks about the work she does. She offers to get me gigs, but I am not sure if I want to do that. Yeah. I don't need the money but that's not the point is it?

Of course I can't forget Ole,

How can the first two posters have any idea whether she would like being a lawyer, never mind whether she'd be a good one? She's a frigging teenager. How many of you knew what you wanted to do at that age?

I think this is the closest thing to support from Ole. I am not complaining. I'll take whatever I can. I'm not a teenager anymore. I am sort of like that Britney Spears song. I'm not a girl but not yet a woman. But thank you Ole.

This was the best.

do not go to law school. everyone there is ugly and wears ugly shoes. ick

I am in a very different place right now. There are so many paths in front of me, so many things. But which is the right one. I don't know. She is right. Law students are not the greatest dressers I guess that is why they OD on Brooks Brothers and Hickey Freedman.

Can't forget this.

You're too fat to be a lawyer.

And your too poor to own a computer yet here you are.
So eat s**t and die.

Btw, Shoshanna has good s**t. Love her bras.

Monday, April 25, 2005

The Passover Jews

Last year my sister and my brother in law were with the rest of the family for passover. Now this year they are going to celebrate passover at her in laws. They trade off each year. When I was in college I had an excuse not to attend since I was on the west coast and my sister took my place.

I thought we were going to go to Connecticut but we ended up at some distant relatives home in Queens that I hadn't seen since my bat mitzvah. These people were not ordinary Jews. They were Passover Jews. I mean men with black hats and women wearing wigs.

Matzoh, matzoh and more matzoh. It never ends. It wasn't the store bought brand since they said it was homemade but I think it was made from the first passover because it was hard and nasty. They actually measured how matzoh was required for the Seder. The homemade matzoh actually cost 20 bucks a pound. They could have gotten like a couple of boxes of garlic, cinnamon and egg matzoh for that price.

When they asked me what I was doing I told them I was working as an intern at a law office. They were quite impressed, one of them asked if I was going to join the family business. I was like I am not sure yet.

It was kind of weird, in a good way. People treat you differently when you are working. You are like part of some club. The high point of the evening was Dad commenting that I would make a great lawyer.

We left 2:30am but the ride home was a bit rocky. Dad was asking if I had looked at the LSATS. I said I was thinking about it. He kept pressing me to go to law school. I was like I had to think about it and I wasn't sure. Besides I had time.

Then he started to go on about how time moved so fast. Mom pretended to by asleep.
This all gave me flashbacks to the letter he wrote me.

Dad dropped me off and I kissed everyone goodnight.

Saturday, April 23, 2005

This blows

Tired, exhausted. YesTd was hell. Waiting for faxes from the other side of the world that never came. Didn't get in till 10pm. Wasn't in mood to go out. Working sucks. All this for ten bucks an hour. I can't believe people do this for the rest of their life. How the hell do you live? How the hell do you have a life?

I have a sore throat and a bit of a headache. I just want to stay in bed all day. My cell phone is turned off. But I have to leave for passover.

Why is the same entry published twice?

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Crazy in the heat

Air conditioning went down in falmes. The whole office a freaking sauna. We were sweating while the lawyers were screaming for briefs and other lawyer stuff. The lawyer who interviewed me was screaming at someone on the phone for half the day because a real estate deal was falling apart.

I am watching law and order. Dennis Farina is cute.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005


I was wearing my business suit with my hair in a tight bun while hauling files to the west village. I cut through the park and was tortured by girls wear shors and tanktops while boys were wearing cutoffs and basketball jerseys. Oh god I wanted to toss the files and lay down a towel and join the cult of sun worshippers.

But nooooo. I have to woooork, And get life experrreeeeeeince.

Monday, April 18, 2005

Not in the mood

More hate mail from the haters.

Blowing a fello trust-funder from jersey does not count as a "job". But I'm sure your dad would still be proud.

A man's penis is probably the smartest thing to ever come out of your mouth.

You know alot about Bj. My guess is that you probably apprenticed under your Dad. Literally.

I am really exhausted right now. I spent the whole getting yelled at and playing xerox cop.

Yes. I have a job. Actually its an internship. My Dad was pissed as hell when I told him I was rejected. He started yelling at me in the office that I should have called back and demanded why I was rejected. I was like what's the point? He said if you want anything in life you have to fight for it. It is not always served on a silver platter.

One of his butt boys tried coming into the office he told him to get the f**k out. He left.

He called up the firm and got into a huge yelling match with one of the partners. They kept telling him that I wasn't qualified. My Dad screamed at them that I was not there to do Torts or litigate but to make copies and pass out the coffee. The partner screamed back that maybe that is how you treat your paralegals but at our firm we expect that they should be able to draft motions, subpoenas and some other stuff I have no idea means. Then he left a parting shot saying that maybe if my Dad had hired better paralegals he wouldn't have lost his last case.

All of a sudden Dad got really quiet and in this tone of ice he said the case is not lost its on appeal. Its really scary when Dad does that because he just turns cold. The last time he did that to me when I was 13 and he caught me sneaking out to this party in Astoria. After that I was even scared to go to school.

He coldly said the partner that they are obviously underhanded at the firm since they are just starting out and it wouldn't hurt to have someone to assist the paralegals with the scut work while they concentrate on helping the lawyers.
So they agreed that I would be a paid intern for 5 days a week from 9-6 for 10 bucks an hour.

Dad hung up the phone and told me to wear business attire and do not be late.
I was like do you have any advice?

His reponse was no. You'll figure it out. We all do.

When I left the office I saw the buttboy that my Dad yelled at ouside puffing away on a smoke and looking really scared.

Friday, April 15, 2005

Step off

Ok. The weather is getting better. And I guess that means a**holes are comignout of hibernation. I would like to share some with them all of you.

money can't buy class. PP is the prime example.

Money is class baby. And don't you forget it.

I'm rich and I think you're a useless ho. In fact, I choose to work because the people I surround myself are real, which makes me even richer than you! Your types are full of shit insecure wannabe celebrities. If you're truly happy, go do what you do. But don't assume others are not because they don't live the way you do. That's just ignorance.

God, you are so in denial that you should be living in Egypt. I don't assume people are unhappy. I know they are unhappy. If they were really happy they wouldn't be attacking me. Yeah you surround yourself with real people. Real stupid people. You don't need to look for real people. They come to you. Your right about one thing. I'm not happy but I ain't bitter beeyotch.

if i were your father PP, i would ask you to refund the tuition for college and prep school because you've obviously put that education to no use

No one puts their education to good use. I have met people who have changed their majors 5 times and even after that they are working in completely different arenas. I know lawyers who are compeletly unhappy with what they are doing. Its all unpredictable.

PP, I am the anonymous commenter who said "it's a JAP RAP song you bunch of fools".
As far as I know, I coined the phrase to describe your work. But you are welcome to use it.
The other commenters were calling it a poem, and I knew it was a song, a Rap song.
I was standing up for you, honey.
And...I am Jewish.;)

Well I'll just take your word that it was a kunts and that you are down with the luftmentsh.

Dearest PP,
I have been reading your blog for quite awhile now, and this is the conclusion I have come to:
In your interior self you actually possess a real depth of mind, heart and spirit. However, because of your upbringing it has never been recognized or nurtured.
Your parents suffocated their own sensitive interior selves, and they have attempted to do the same to you.
I think they will have failed, though, in their attempt to crush your spirit, if you keep writing, thereby allowing yourself to expand the parameters of that tight little psychological space they tried to squeeze you into.
Keep writing your songs, keep exposing your thoughts, keep stretching the bars of that golden cage.
Don't give in to their demands, their threats, their guilt trips. Don't be like like you...the real you, the one who keeps crying to get free.
love you,PP!

Its nice of you to say those things but please do not put the blame on my parents. I know I get into fights with them. But I know they love me. Looking back on my life,they never squeezed me into anyhting. They let me do what I want. The only people who are trying to crush me are the haters who post from the dark.

This flashes me all the way back to the day. I remember my freshman year when all of a sudden a group of girls turned on me. They would write things like slut and tramp on my locker and leave nasty notes on my desk when I wasn't looking. I could never prove it was them since they would never admit it and I never saw them write those things but I knew it was them. But when they saw I wouldn't cry they got bored and moved onto the next victim. Bring ir on beeyotches.

Its not going to matter anyway since I got a job now.

Thursday, April 14, 2005

Is this what's going to happen everytime I throw a rhyme?
A ton of you are going to throw slime while the rest are going to be divine?

To all the haters you are just a wannabe players
angry because you have to rub your cents to make the rent.
While my money is spent

With plenty leftover to get ten makeovers.

Britney is something you want to be.
Famous and rich not some broke down beeyatch
Yeah she's going to be a mom, singing a lullaby song
Not cool ragging on the unborn even one with a silver spoon.

Ok that's enough. This poem stuff is really hurting my head.

Not cool you guys. This was more abuse than usual. Don't make fun of my flower. It smells like roses and it needs to breathe.

Appleblossom thanks for the props. I am not sure what you mean by character.

That was a cute poem NYiBanker. No we are not hot and heavy. For all I know NYibanker plays on the other team.

I guess what I do JAP rap. But only I can say that since I am Jewish.

The only thing worse than reading that horrid excuse of a poem is picturing your huge ass in daisy-dukes.

I bet it's like an enormous garbage bag filled with cottage cheese.

PP, why do I get the feeling you are a nasty-ass fat ho who leaves little to the imagination? the men are staring because they can't get over your rolls and cratered butt. ew.

yes, her vagina probably does smell.

I have a fantastic ass because I do pilates and yoga and stay away from the stairmaster. Cottage Cheese? Is that the only thing you can afford after paying the rent?

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Britney Pregnant

I was going to write about how pissed I was about everyone's comments but it has been announced Britney Spears is expecting a child. I think its really cool she is becoming a mother. I hope everything turns out alright. As for her choice in man. The jury is still out on that.

Friday, April 08, 2005


The twins are coming out, through my halter top, two raisin points are going to shout
No bra and panties on, not even a tampon
Not a ho, just going commando.
Feel the warm air, just makes you want to go bare.
Got skin that just wants to sin. Make the boys look and read me like a book.

I feel the wind light whisper as I walk and talk on my cell phone more guys stop and gawk
Looking to the nights when light leaves late. Don’t hesitate, go on a date.
Sunbathing, rollerblading and just plain escaping. All in Central Park. Be still my heart.

Minks and UGGs back in the closet. I want my warm weather deposit.
Break out the Daisy Dukes splashed with BoHo juice.

Not stiff and covered up, no more of that stuff.
Wearing a skirt so loose it shows my Jewish Caboose.

Winter is gone. Time to get my Spring on.

Hitting B8

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

You have nothing

I am at this barebecue with with a mix of friends from private school and I am cutting some cake and I am talking to this girl and ask how she is doing but for some reason this guy walks into the conversation and says to me.
I have a house and a pool and you? You've got nothing.

I look up in shock to see this a**hole that I knew from Horace Mann. He was this fat kid who thought he was such a big deal in 7th grade because he had fingerd at a bar mitzvah. He ended up working for the family business in South Africa and the last I heard he was wounded in a shoot out with his ex-girlfriend after she caught him schtupping her cousin.

I have been up since 5am and I can't sleep. This dream has really gotten to me. What really pisses me off is that those words are said by somone I really dislike. But I don't have anyhting. I mean what do I have to leave to the world? Other than my trust fund. What do I have that says to everyone that I was here?

The only thing I got from that job interview was ding letter saying thank you for playing and goodbye. When I told Dad he freaked. I was like what's the big deal. He said if you want something in life you have to fight for it. Its never handed to you. And I was like this is just a stupid paralegal job. He was like that's not the point. Those people dismissed you. They think you are waste of their time. And until you prove them wrong, people will always treat you that way. I was like what am I supposed to do now? He told me to go back and call them and demand why I did not get the position and tell them why I am qualified for the position.

That was more than a week ago. I am trying to ignore but it has been bothering me. I should say something, do something. Maybe that is what that guy in the movie theatre meant when he "You will be one day."

Monday, April 04, 2005

Sin City

"Excuse me"


"You will be one day."

This is the conversation I had with this creepy guy at the Theatre in Union Square yesterday. I was waiting for the claque by ticket taker when this guy went past me to the ticket taker. I was like what. When the rest of the girls came up I told them what happened. VD was really p'oed. She was stuck in a feed room for the last 24 hours checking on video straight from the Vatican while some 35 year old production assistant kept coming in hitting on her.

She was itching to get into a fight. K, T and B were all suffering from cabin fever and I just wanted to watch a movie.

Sin City kicked ass. I am not a major fan of black and white but I hardly noticed it watching this moive. Ok. Not all of it was b&w. There were touches of color.

VD loved it when the hookers got their bitch on. I won't give it away but VD talked about getting a samurai sword and an uzi and going to work on that 35 year old production assistant. Whenever he would visit her in the feed room he would try to mpress her with his film connections and about audtions or film roles he never got. He would tell her that he could have been in Pearl Harbor but Hartnett got that role. Hartnett was really great in Sin City. And I think saw a Gilmore Girl. I wasn't sure.

Vd kept shooting him down like if he was such a big deal why was he talking to him and not Martin Scorcese. He kept making excuses that the film industry is so corrupt and he wanted to do something that was more pure to his soul.

I got to admit the guy had lines that could string along a prom queen from the Ozarks.

I want to be a little girl who is rescued by Bruce Willis and becomes a stripper in dancing on a bar surrounded by the scum of the underworld. I want a lasso and leather chaps showing my flat stomach and an ass to kill for. I want to jump off the bar and be kissed by the man who I wrote letters to for 9 years. I want to be Jessica Alba.

Saturday, April 02, 2005

He has died

All day its been coverage on the Pope. First they say he's dead than alive.

Frank Perdue is dead. I kind of remember his commercials as a child. They say death comes in threes.

VD got wrangled into being a PA for this news production company. Back in college she did an internship with them. Anyway all of their people are in Italy or preparing to go to go so they need somone to be help the producers. She hates this type of work since its stressful and there is very little money. But the producer who she is working for can help her out with her PR company.

The rest of the claque wanted to go out but I am not sure its right to have a pope party right now. I spent all day cleaning up and stocking up for the rain. This weekend is going to suck.

I think what is amazing is that all these people are praying for him. It feels like this huge vigil. It reminds me of when Grandma died. Her last days were surrounded by family and friends waiting to hear her last breath. Grandma, I miss you.