Monday, January 02, 2006

Pain for the New Year

TV you are my only companion in my time of need. It guides me as I enter my Vicodin haze which I embrace once again.

Aspen was awesome. As I landed I was surrounded amongst my kind, the beautiful people. Coming from all corners of the world anddressed in tres chic winter fashion they catwalked their way across Aspen. In the car ride I day dreamed of how I was going to mingle with the young and beautiful and have the boys lapping at my words and the girls cooing as I danced the night away.


My Father's client who we are staying with owns a bunch of medical labs in Stonybrook. Apparently he does very well because his place was f**king huge. It had like ten plus bedrooms and a guest house. It even had a heated indoor pool. I learned later on that his second wife often swam in the nude while he watched.


The first three days were filled with skiing, hot cider and hot guys. DC (Dad's Client) played consort as he introduced me to his circle of friends. At night we went barhopping and then ended up at somone's mansion or ski lodge where we would have a post drink feast of smoked salmon, caviar, blintzes. There were hook ups galore and yours truly did partake in the yummy boy platter.


Extreme thy name is Silverton. I think when you reach a certain age you ask yourself have I taken my life to the limit? Have I done everything I wanted to do? Can I leave this plane of existence without any regrets?

I think that is what prompted the adults to go to Silverton because us kids had nothing to do with it. On the fourth day I was told that we were going to Silverton because DC and Dad wanted to try some new trails.

Don't get me wrong. Silverton is a really great place to ski, But when they start giving you tips about to survive avalanches you might want to reconsider. Despite those facts I was actually looking forward to skiing there since my injury. Ok. It's not what you think. I didn't take a massive spill down a double black diamong. I didn't smack head first into a tree. What happened was that I did not bend knees when I picked up my skis and put it into the SUV.

I felt that I pulled something in my back but I figured it would just go away bu the pain started to get sharper and bigger. Things got really interesting when I got in the car that I sneezed that I flet something burst in my back.

It was like one of my muscles had popped and I screamed which freaked everyone out. The DC called a doctor while my parents walked me back into the mansion to lie down.

Mom and Dad were peppering me with questions try to figure out what my diagnosis was.

Parents
"What type of pain do you feel"

Me
"It's pain. Just pain. It's not f**king ice cream flavors. It is just pain. Jesus, it hurts."

Parents
"Maybe it's a herniated disc" "If it is a herniated disc then we are going to have to call a neurosurgeon."

The doctor turned out to be a good neighbor of the DC who checked me out. His diagnosis was that it was probably sciatica and that I should get plenty of bedrestand take some anti-inflamation medication which he prescribed. BUT NO PAINKILLERS! ARRRG!

After I got my drugs an executive decision was made that I would be left behind while the rest took off. I was completely supportive of their decision. The last thing I wanted to do was be the wet towel for everyone else.

In a nutshell I spent New Year's eve alone in a Mansion while others skied the days and partied the nights away.

Fast forward to now. I had some leftover Vic from my root canal and I am sure I will be able to wrangle some from my doctor. NO. I am not a druggie. I am really in alot of pain. I can barely lift my right leg above my waist.

So. If this is an indication of what I should expect from the New Year, then I might as well just stay in bed till 2007.

5 Comments:

Blogger industry whore said...

your parents left you home alone and in pain on new years?! dude. that's fucked up.

11:15 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've had sciataca for years. It hurts but not *that* bad. I think your Aspen doc had too many hot ciders - you'd better get a 2nd opinion and an MRI pronto.

9:42 AM  
Blogger Courting Couture said...

happy new year! Nothing rings it in like vic...or...valium!

9:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This blog sucks.

10:48 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This blog is a joke, right? Is it a spoof? I have never read anything as lame as this in my life.

5:36 PM  

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