Thursday, March 02, 2006

Clearing of the mind

I have these funky yoga tapes that have been lying around my apartment for about a year and just recently I started to use them since I heard yoga was great for relieving back pain. It has made a huge difference and now I am addicted to yoga.

I got really freaked out after the first day of doing yoga because I was filled with all this s**t. I mean, like rage, anger, hostility, pain and other negative feelings. Memories of every bitch, c**t and a$$hole who has ever f**ked with me seem to come out all at once. It was like this weird like flashback to stuff I haven't thought about in years. Stuff I thought I let go, like my gig at the law firm was steamrolling back into my head. Or the time I got beat up by those girls at the birthday party in Chappaqua when I was in 6th grade. It was so overwhelming that I wanted to get into a fight with anybody on the street. I wanted to line up those people and punch up in the face.

It got so bad I could barely blog since I felt so paralyzed with my anger. It got to a point where I would screen my calls. The BS is really annoyed about that. But I just could not deal.

But after it would go away I would feel really calm and peaceful. I was considering just stopping yoga cold turkey until I found this.

You may experience a variety of negative emotions, along with their associated thoughts. You should welcome these feelings, because they are cleansing. Be with the feelings in the Witness, neither reacting to nor rejecting them. In this way you access deep, hidden levels of body-held suppressed negativity and open the door to transcendental experiences of higher consciousness, approached through the body.

I guess it worked because I was really relaxed for that interview.


Anonymous Ole said...

I'm so bored by this blog that even I have left. Last entry. I'd like to say that it was a pleasure. It wasn't.

Hope it turns out ok. Bye.

6:12 AM  
Anonymous pradaprincess said...

Ole, you attention whore, I thought left awhile ago.

5:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You grew up in Chappaqua? Or maybe you just went to party there. We're about the same age. Do you remember the names of any of those skanks who beat you up?

11:16 AM  

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