Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Burlesque: Stripping for fat girls

I am in the fashion trends department and part of my job is looking through the news for trends. I hope to god this doesn't become popular.

Welcome to Burlesque 101 at the Red Hots Burlesque School of Shimmy, where 17 beginners — including one man — learn the history of burlesque, how to develop a costume and comic character and how to pick a stage name.

Armed with boas, shimmy skirts and feather fans, they tackle the bump, the grind, the shimmy and the shake.

"I really do want to be a burlesque dancer," said Nancy, 26, an art director who favors vinyl for her costume and calls herself Agent N. She said: "This way I get to do my own thing on my own terms. That's what's so great about it. It's freedom of expression, expression of my womanhood and my sensuality."

Freedome to let loose your enormous thighs onto the world is not sensuality or woman hood. There are somethings human civilization was not meant to see. One of them was women who pack away three sticks of butter for breakfast jiggle the junk in their trunk.

I think this is a serious saftey hazard because women who do this in public can cause spontaneous blindness. Somone has to close this place down.


Blogger -J. said...

I think the redhead has some potential, actually.

1:12 PM  
Anonymous Ally said... fat girls can sure dish it out to each other huh? Fat on Fat hate is so uncalled for

2:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Prada Princess is the biggest loser

11:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Huh. Imagine hating your own self so much that you would write something like that. Kinda sad, huh?

3:19 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You obviously haven't seen these girls. The Red Hots themselves, that is. They are amazing, hot, smart, brilliant, attractive and better than you. Feel free to introduce yourself. I'm at everyone of their shows.
Val Killmore

3:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why are you so concerned with what other people are doing? Why don't you find some activity that makes *you* happy rather than being nasty about women who are doing something that makes *them* happy. It takes balls to get up in front of people and perform. It's not like hiding behind a keyboard and taking pot shots at strangers.

3:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why would anyone be so hateful just for the sake of it?

There are *great* performers out there who are large by society's current western standard. So fucking what. They are amazing and beautiful and actually do something creative not just criticizing
other people they haven't even seen perform.

Also, burlesque isnt just stripping--its dancing and performing. Being a good burlesque performer has very little to do with body type.

3:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"...women who pack away three sticks of butter for breakfst..."


Maybe you should work on not making assumptions, like anyone who is bigger than your idea of normal size (the woman in the picture is not "huge" by any standards, btw) is eating three sticks of butter or the equivalent for breakfast. That's just crude, rude and unnecessary.

4:05 PM  
Blogger bifemmefatale said...

Most cultures in this world like a woman who is plump by American standards and think skinny girls are unattractive. Marilyn Monroe was a size 12-14.

4:48 PM  
Anonymous Alex said...

I think all the women in the frame of that photo are very attractive.

Snide commentaries such as these are often a sign of deep-seated insecurity.

You wouldn't be a complete piece of crap, would you?

5:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Prada Princess, I feel the same way you do only you have the guts to actually come out and say what so many are thinking. Some others who are angry or feel hatred toward you over your opinion need to relax.

7:52 PM  
Anonymous Bella Beretta said...

As a what you would cnsider "Fat girl"
in the burlesque scene. I can say that this has been one of the few places ( even in Hollywood) where my weight hasn't been an issue.
What trubles me about this isn't your desire to neversee them strip.
You have your aesthetic- I don't want to watch a person who has no stage training strip...there we a go. A difference of opinion.
However your judgement of a woman who eats 3 sticks of butter for breakfast..well splendabuns- why do you so deeply care?
There are a good deal of us dancing who do not meet the standard of modern thin, but does that mean we need to hide away? Don the burqa and never be seen because we are not thin?
We're performers.
Not runway models.
I think you have a very skewed idea of what burlesque is about.
You should educate yourself.
Sure it is striptease, we strip- but we are also funny,aware,violent,surreal,obscure, irreverent and just plain odd.
Know the artform, and know that some of us put the art before the form.
And the bookings keep rolling in

8:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow. I sure hope you don't ever get knocked up by whatever asshole is drunk/shallow enough to fuck/marry you.

Because you would be a terrible mother.

8:29 PM  
Anonymous idiomagic said...

I think there's room for everyone in the entertainment industry, no matter what size, shape, or whatever. It's the talent and the passion that matter.
There really is no call, in any forum, for snarky opinions without facts to reference...If you don't like the art of burlesque, fine. That's your opinion.
But naked hatred based on physical characteristics is kind of beneath you, don't you think?

9:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

well, hey. I persoanlly can't stand seeing a bony-ass (not) shaking her stuff. There's nothing to shake. I could have an eye put out with an errant hipbone and all.

Bring on the curve slingin' dancing girls shaking what thier momma gave them!

10:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hm. Funny that I don't see you bringing your sorry ass out to perform. Don't knock it unless you do it, bitch.

5:19 AM  
Anonymous fierceblue said...

It seems like you really don't understand what burlesque is. It's not "stripping."

Burlesque is Art. No, really. Take Little Brooklyn, for example. She is one of the best burly-q girls in the country and she does routines inspired by "Mommie Dearest," "Silence of the Lambs," and Pee-Wee Herman. They bring down the house every time. That ain't stripping, sister.

Come out and see The Red Hots or Starshine Burlesque. I think you'd appreciate the hard work, humor and creativity that goes into these acts-- acts by women of ALL sizes-- if you took the time to actually see one.

6:26 AM  
Anonymous Lauren said...

Well. I'm sure, at the end of the day, they'd rather be fat than a useless, bland, insecure, bitter, cruel, terrified, vapid, moronic, spoiled cunt of a woman who can't think of anything better to do with her time than post a blog entry - brimming with thinly veiled self hatred - about how disgustingly misinformed and judgemental she is regarding their bodies and their art.

"Prada Princess"? Girl, please.

6:40 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hm. Yeah, I'm pretty sure you're nothing more than a miserable cunt, you prada-wearing ax wound.

8:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

wow. just wow.
I was going to say something.
but It's been said.
my mouth is on the floor. damn.
not only do some of these ladies have a way with a shimmy and shake regardless of what their momma gave them. apparenly they also have a way with words.
I feel like a lot of it might have been wasted on the likes of you... but it touched me and reminded me why I love this art form.

8:12 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You are a blight on life and I could weep for your painful, painful ignorance.

I wonder.

Would you have the balls to go to a show and say these things to the women in person.

All the people who don't know you are better off for it.

9:21 AM  
Anonymous water_childe said...

How dare you spread the narrow minded retoric that in order to have any kind of sex appeal or self worth that a woman must fit into the ridiculous ideals put forth by our media.
How hateful, vapid, and idiotic of you. Oh, I'm sorry, you must be perfect and we lesser mortals who don't qualify as 'the beautiful people' can go wallow in shit because we're not presenting you with the image you wanna see. How shallow you must be. And lest you think that the only reason I'm commenting is that I must be some easily dismissed subhumanoid fat girl, think again. I don't qualify as one of the hot volumptuous ladies you so readily diss, but I have many gorgous hot curvy fat girl friends who don't need bitches like you spreading the hate around. Grow the fuck up.

9:37 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, guess what, ya dumb cunt? Your little blog is about as entertaining, insightful and worthwhile as the dogshit I scraped off my shoe this morning.

And it's really great that you're "thin"--congratulations. You're still one of the ugliest people ever put on this planet.

9:48 AM  
Blogger moto said...

In the future, when you ask yourself, "Why do all the men I date treat me like shit?" and "Why do all my friends suck?" you find the answer in this post laced with self-loathing.

It is very clear that you have serious body-image issues and it sounds like you compensate for that with some over-blown materialism. I truly hope that in 20 years, when you have gradually settled into a body your younger self would find repulsive, that you have developed some sort of esteem that doesn't involve appearance. Your misery will be easy to spot if you don't.

9:52 AM  
Anonymous ikanread said...

I won't reiterate a lot of the good points already stated. But I would like to mention, that at least if you're going to be hateful, you should use the spell check--it's one of our greatest "freedomes" as bloggers. It doesn't help your cause of NOT coming off as an ignorant, bitter, self-involved hag.

Not saying you are one, just a tip as an editor.

The problem with beauty is that it changes throughout the ages. Right now, looking like a starving 13 year old boy seems to be in fashion, but if we went back 100 years or so, everyone would be drooling and fumbling over themselves to even have these women talk to them, much less show off their womanly attributes (and contrary to what you imply, they still are--don't let the Prada ads fool you, men love a little junk in the trunk).

I have no idea what side of the weight scale you fall on, but what you hate now is what you would have envied before. Don't let preconceived notions of what is sexy distract you from the fact that every body and every life has beauty to it. We as women are taught from an early age to judge and hate the way we look. I don't care if you're 87 lbs or 207 lbs, if shaking what you got makes you appreciate yourself and feel good in your own skin, then we should thank the Heavens there is something in the world that can help women end this cycle of self-hatred.

I would urge you to find something that makes you love yourself in the same way. It will make you less hateful and judgemental of others, whose experience and whose beauty are things you apparently cannot comprehend.

10:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmm...I think there are enough words here. Let me be succinct.

You are a fucking hack. Subject matter aside, your writing is like reading the transcript from the play by play of a hockey game.

Yes, I am biased. Fuck you.

10:37 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I find you terribly depressing Prada Princess. I can't imagine you actually enjoy being told by dozens of people that you're a horrible person. I mean it can't feel good.

Unfortunately for you, essentially nothing anyone has said is off base. You come across as a hateful, insecure child with the intellectual capacity of spore mold. Is that how you want the world to see you?

Take a good long look in the mirror kid and try to figure out what it is that you hate so much about yourself that you've got to lash out at other women who have the self confidance and pride to do something you're obviously too terrified to do.

One of these women is a dear friend of mine, someone you, with your pathetic, whiny, sad view of life and yourself, wouldn't be able to touch with a ten foot pole.

So as far as I'm concerned you can take your twisted, hateful opinion and shove it.

10:49 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

After reading some of your other enlightened, informed, and articulate posts, I can only say I feel sorry for you.

And can onnly hope that you're barren.

10:51 AM  
Blogger Christastrophe said...

Ah, who cares? I got all puffed up trying to figure out a way to cut you down but everybody already got all the good stuff. Yeah, you can't write worth a damn. Yeah, your blog is boring (unless it's "outrageous", and even that's pretty boring).

Yeah yeah, maybe you're fat and self-loathing and maybe you're just another bland skinny stupid, stupid girl that nobody really gives a shit about and, certainly, nobody admires. Maybe you're a disappointment to your parents and your sister will always be their favorite because she actually did something with her life while you sat around, worthless and dull; unskilled and unknown.

Maybe. Who knows? Who cares?

The fact is that I ain't coming back here and probably most of the other people who have written are, either. Just a bunch of pissed-off people who want to come in, get their flame on, and leave and that's it (unless you do another one of those stupid posts where you respond to every comment with a lot of misspelled words and half-wit cut-downs).

Whatever. We're in, we're out, we're not intrigued. There are better places to go to read stuff by bitches who "tell it like it is". Fact is, this whole PP deal is wholly unremarkable and unmemorable, which I'm sure is a description that fits your life. And probably always will.

Now respond! Say something that you think is witty that makes us laugh at you even more!! Something like, "you can suck my ass". That was a good one!

12:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


1:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Whoa, no reason to bring Jews or the Japanese into this. If we do, then we're no better than this fat hater bitch we're all commenting about.

2:34 PM  
Anonymous Shannon said...

Wow. That post was mean, and mean is totally unnecessary. Why not just avoid shows that you know you won't enjoy?

3:37 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well okay. Let's be fair. Everyone has the right to do whatever they want with their bodies. We're all human beings here. What's right for you may not be right for some (and other lines from the Dif'rent Strokes theme song).

Having said that, I agree that these women are mostly annoying, but their annoyance doesn't start at the breakfast table. It begins at the opposite side of the spectrum, starvation. And what they're starving for? Yep - good ol' American attention.

I'm a firm believer in the notion, "If you've got it -- don't flaunt it, just enjoy it yourself, others will respond in kind."

7:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I feel so sorry for you. You're just that pathetic. I'm not fat at all. But I don't make comments like this about any woman. Ever. You're the reason women in American society still let men dictate how they should look. You're a brainwashed airhead.

12:54 PM  

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