Sunday, November 21, 2004

Falling off the Atkins Wagon

Ok, we didn't fall off the wagon, it was more like a flying leap. We had been doing atkins for the past two weeks and finally VD and I broke our vows of carb chasitity at this restaurant on the lower east side called Inoteca

We saw this guy munching on what turned out to be truffle egg toast and we just stormed in and ordered two orders of the toast, a goat cheese panninni and Pesto Brusectta.


I was going to break out my new platnium card courtesy of my trust fund. Thank you Grandma. But the jerks only took cash. We got into a huge fight with the manager who kept rubbing the goatee on her chin and kept moving her head from side to side with each rub as if her goatee was a special switch that turned her head.

I mean who the hell carries cash these days except for pimps and drug dealers? The last time I saw someone with cash was when I was at Spa this slime from the Bride and Tunnel clan tried to impress me by whipping a wad stuffed in a clip. He attempted to buy me a drink and I told him the only drug dealers I date are doctors.

VD was soooo POed and had to go to the bodgea next door which had the only ATM. She hates paying extra fees and I didn't bring my atm card.

While she was getting the money, the waiter, some Neanderthal from red hook was trying to make time with me, telling me about his cover band that does covers of Information society and how they were eon VH1 bands reunited. He kept running his tongue across his teeth as if he was scouring them for debris. "I'm part of a band" monologue works on drunk girls from the jersey shore but I from the upper west side and we don't do the shore.

I was just about to tell him to shove it when VD storms in she smakcs down 50 bucks and screams "That truffle egg toast was more toast than truffle. You ****"

"When did the lower east side start becoming the upper west side?" she cursed under her breath.

She got over it really quickly when we ran into the Sugar Sweet Sunshine Bakery
This place blows Magnolia's out of the water. We ended up scarfing down 4 cupackes a piece including pistachio, pumpkin and red velvet.


We walked around the rest of the lower east side looking at the neighborhood, its changed alot since my days at Spence. I used to slip our doorman a fifty so he would tell my parents that he didn't see me when I snuck out to go barhopping down here and eat breakfast at B & H Dairy then run off to class.

Now there's a new building called the Avalon Chrystie over by the resutarant supply stores over by the Bowery and Second Ave.

No. I did not take these pix. I found them online.


Sometimes I wish I didn't go the west coast for college. At least I could have seen the changes.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

LES is nothing like UWS, thats why I live here.

Go back to the stale mink and passe' Logo Vernis totes of columbus circle, please don't come back.

P.S. You don't need a trust fund to get a platimum card

10:42 AM  

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