Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Marriage

I got this comment about my marriage entry.

PP, I may just not be understanding something here. How can you be thinking about marriage when there's no one in your life? Don't you have to first meet a man, then start dating him, figure out if you like him, let alone love him, and a lot of other stuff before you can actually consider getting married? There's nothing abstract about marriage. It's very real.


Sweetie, before you get to that point you got have a gameplan. You have to have goals. Marriagejust doesn't happen on its own. A girl is always on the prowl.



This was a comment from J.Green

Anon,

You obviously don't understand the mindstate of someone like PP. As someone with much experience with people very much like PP, let me explain.

Where did this experience come from? Watching reruns of 90210? or was it the time you were hanging out with your friend ducky?

PP views marriage much as you or I would view a profession. For example; I decide to be a lawyer. Once this decision is made I proceed to write my LSATs, apply to law schools, finish law school, write the bar, join a firm and then voila I am a lawyer and I have achieved that goal.

Getting married is not a profession it is a life changing decision. And you need to plan. It isn't like the movies, like 4 weddings and a Funeral and Shrek. It doesn't just happen. You need to prepare yourself for it. It sounds shallow doesn't it? But look at Lindsay Lohan. Her first boyfriend was Wilmer Valderama. Do you think that came out of nowhere? No. She obviously was attractive to Wilmer but if he wasn't star of the 70's show and was flipping burgers at Johnny Rockets Lindsay wouldn't have given him the time of day.

To her marriage is very much the same. Once someone like her "decides" on marriage, they then get themselves in physical shape, then make it known to friends and relatives they are ready to settle down, date a few men who fit the qualifications (ostensibly Jewish, a professional/successful entrepreneur, from a decent family), and after finding one who fits the quals and has also decided on marriage they have a beautiful marriage. And thus the goal to become married has been fulfilled.

Do you all remember the story of Cinderella? She is a pretty yet grubbily dressed girl who couldn't go to the ball because of her evil stepsisters ditch her. Then the fairy godmother comes in. Gives her a makeover and off she goes to the ball where Prince Charming falls in love with her. You all know rest, clock strikes midnight, she looses her shoe, Prince Charming has every girl in the kingdom try on the shoe. Finally it finds her foot. True love conquers thatnks to a milano blahnik. But would the Prince have been attracted to her in the first place if she didn't have her make over? Would Cinderella have settled for the woodmsn from Little Riding Hood? Hell's no. The only man who was going to tap her ass was one who could put a crown on her head. Even in fairy tales, marriage is a goal. You got to be prepared for that.

I realize for many people looking at marriage in this manner seems to be backward. I am trying to deal with this issue as we speak, since I seem to fit many girls like PP's quals.

Dude, I have no idea what qualifications you are talking but they sure ain't mine. My approach is not backwards. It's reality. Marriage is a recipe. Men and women look at each to see if we'll cook. Some women are looking for ground beef, others salmon. I'm a caviar girl. I know I will get a caviar guy. I won't accept anything less.

I'm not judging PP for thinking like this, mostly because i truly don't care. But if you are reading this blog and feel a little "lost" as to her train of thought, maybe this will help you understand her.

To her and girls with her state of mind marriage is in fact an abstract concept, maybe even a goal. This concept has time limits, restrictions and such.

The reason why people are lost is because they got Pretty Woman on the brain. They think if they have a heart of gold, Richard Gere will come to sweep them off their feet. Irregardless of the fact that they have been giving handjobs on the side. Not true my brother and sisters.

You are judging me and I am not judging you for judging me. Because we all judge each other. The moment we look at someone we make our calls who this person is and if they worth talking to.

Marriage is all about limits and restrictions. When a guy gets married and has kids he can't just go out anymore with the guys and have beers. He has to take care of the kids, mow the lawn, do the dishes. When a girl gets married and has kids she becomes a soccer mom driving her kids back and forth to school. She has to take time in the morning to make the lunches.

Once I get married, I can't hit the clubs as much anymore. Neither can my husband. all benefits of the single scene are now gone.

There's even limitations in cheating. You have to figure out how to sneak out of the house without your husband knowing what you are doing. Even if you are in an open marriage there are certain restrictions that have to be followed. There are some wives who tolerate it as long as their husbands don't flaunt it in their face. Some husbands don't care as long as they can watch.

Hope this helps, and PP please don't take this as an insult and correct me if I'm wrong.

J.Green


This is the most honest comment I ever got. A bit flawed. But it's not your fault. It is probably from eating too much poutaine.

6 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

this all still begs the question of who's going to want to marry a whiny immature bitch with a horrible personality and a big ass.

6:11 AM  
Anonymous Ally said...

Now I know you're full of shit because any NYC woman, especially one who claims to be such a fan of Jimmy, Stuart, and Christian, should know how how to fucking spell MANOLO BLAHNIK.
I understand you don't understand much else in life, especially not marriage, or the value of a gym membership, but jesus...

9:34 AM  
Anonymous Ole said...

Ah, so nice to be back.

Where do I start? Let's just dip in and out at random, because it's raining here and that always makes me feel odd.

"getting married is not a profession, it's a life-changing decision". An insight worthy of Dupin himelf. And yet look at the people you are using as your examples. Lindsey Whoever. Cinderella. You genuinely, absolutely, and self fucking evidently have no clue what you're talking about, and you're taking as inspiration the emotionally void celebrity culture which you seem so fucking impressed by. And a fairy tale. If I didn't know better than to expect you to understand, I'd ask you to share the delicious irony in all this.

And then there's this "caviar guy" thing. I almost don't know where to start with this one. Please, tell me more about your perfect man. An MTV presenter? An orthodontist? I can't wait.

And as J Green's points fly whistling over your head, and your laughable attempts at sarcasm and "smackdowns" confirm to everyone that, no matter what else you may be, switched-on and intelligent probably won't be etched on your gravestone, perhaps you'll find solace in whichever sorry system of values appears to have been instilled in you.

7:07 AM  
Blogger jennymack5 said...

I'm getting on my soap box to tell all my fellow women about a procedure that frees us from the burden of our biological clock. I recently had my eggs frozen by Extend Fertility, which ensures that I will have my younger, healthier eggs to use in the future when I have found the right guy and want to have a healthy baby. Its a great opportunity for women to relieve the stress and take the race out of dating.

12:04 PM  
Blogger bubbles said...

it's poutine, not poutaine, but no matter!

6:02 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm impressed that she knows what poutine is.
Do you know what Poutine is?

8:24 PM  

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